What makes a child yours?

In continuing to honor National Adoption Month (November), I would like to share the following account of what defines a "real" child. Does giving birth to a child make them more real than having them delivered to your home in the middle of the night? Is that what creates that parent-child bond?

This is the most straight-forward and powerful definition of adoption I have ever heard. I was led to this blog by a very dear friend of mine (who has no personal experience with either infertility or adoption, by the way, but has also been one of the most sympathetic supports I have).

Here's an excerpt of the definition:

Switched at birth stories rarely happen anywhere outside of Salem or in hospitals other than General, but what if they did? What if your child was not connected to you by blood? Would it matter? Would you trade that child for your “own”?

I doubt many would. You may want to meet the other child. But in your heart? that child is a stranger. You don’t know what they like to eat, or how hard they press the issue of bedtime. You can hardly contemplate the thought of switching back.

Adoption is merely a form of delivery if you will. Some of our children joined our family by coming out of my body, others joined by coming out of a car, but I remember when each of them were handed to me for the first time. The first time I looked upon their amazing faces. And some even came with names which cut out that whole month of debate with hubby over which names were stupid and which weren’t.

So, the question remains, what makes a child yours?

I really encourage you to read the entire post. She does a great visual for those who may feel they wouldn't connect with a child they didn't give birth to.