Adoption Update

We had our second (and final) home visit yesterday afternoon. Our sw (social worker) is going to write up our homestudy and now we just wait for approval. I asked him if we would receive a copy of what he wrote up; he said he's never had anyone ask that before but because I did, we can have one. Score! He also said, because he likes us, he'll even call us when he's finished writing it up and we can go down to his office to read it before he signs it so we can make any changes we feel like making. How nice is that?!

He told us that he would not place any children of another race (except maybe Native American) with us because of not wanting to make that child stand out and feel different. He didn't want us to become an immediate inter-racial family. I was honestly offended at that and told him that I, myself, come from a multi-racial family. That's when he conceded to the possibility of a Native American placement. Through conversation, he made me remember how it made me feel to be the white-skinned, red-headed girl in a darker-skinned Native American world and said that he didn't want to purposefully put an AA (African American) child into a situation where they feel like that regardless of whether Gil and I minded or not. It's about the child and the child's feelings, not ours. I can understand that, honestly, but to come right out and tell us he wouldn't place a child of another race with us kind of hurts. I honestly felt discriminated against because of our white skin. Oh, and did I mention that our sw is African American? So he's already looking at it from a racially biased standpoint.

Our sw also let us know that when selections for placements are made, they're done on a "point" system. Gil and I already lose points because we don't currently have any children in our home, biological or otherwise. So let's just subtract that factor from the difficulty we'll already face because of wanting to adopt rather than foster. I'm excited to be done with our homestudy and be approved and waiting, but I'm discouraged that we won't be meeting our children any time soon. By soon, I'm meaning the next few years.